By Coy Pink

When it comes to things related to sex, I’ve always had this bit of shyness that overtakes me.  I don’t know why, I don’t know where it comes from.  I’ve felt embarrassed to say what I want, what I feel, what I like.  Why?  I’ve been with my husband for almost 15 years now.  We’ve had sex countless times, he’s seen me at my worst and at my best.  Why has it been so hard for me to come out and tell him my inner most thoughts with regards to sex?  If ever there was a person to trust with the dark, sexy thoughts in my head, it’s him.  What is holding me back?

I’m getting better at sharing, that’s for sure.  I’m starting to believe that all the talk about women reaching their sexual peak in their thirties is true.  I’m becoming more confident, less apt to care about what others think of me.  I wouldn’t say I’m 100% happy with my body but I can appreciate my good features.  I’ve grown up, given birth, and my attitudes are changing.  I’m starting to see that there’s no sense in being coy when it comes to my sexual desires.  If I never tell my husband what pleases me, what I want, what I need, how do I expect him to know these things?  Oh, he is skilled at figuring out on his own what I like most of the time.  Fingers here make her squirm, kisses here make her shiver.  But if I never say out loud what is brewing in my mind, all the steamy thoughts I have about spankings and women and dominance, I have no one to blame but myself for not having those needs and desires fulfilled.

So I am now taking the lion’s share of the responsiblity for my sexual satisfaction into my own hands, in a manner of speaking.  If I want it, I need to say it.  If I desire it, I have to let it be known.  I will no longer be embarassed about sex and its trapings.  It serves no purpose.  I want to explore my sexuality with abandon.  What better place than the wide open, anonymous internet for me to write about all the lovely, dirty little things I have spinning around in my head.